


Cooler Than You

by gabrielleabelle



Category: Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Genre: F/F, Mary Sue, Parody
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2009-11-14
Updated: 2009-11-14
Packaged: 2017-10-02 17:18:27
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 382
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8806
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/gabrielleabelle/pseuds/gabrielleabelle
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Buffy faces off against the most powerful foe she's ever met. She has no hope. Until <i>she</i> comes to save the day...</p>
            </blockquote>





	Cooler Than You

**Author's Note:**

> Barb wanted to see Mary Sues with laser eyes and pet unicorns and stuff. Well, "wanted" may be too strong a word for it. But she wanted a non-heteronormative, unpassive Mary Sue. So I'm delivering just for her. :) Set during Buffy's fight with Glory in _No Place Like Home_

"Can you fly?"

The blonde women then tossed Buffy across the room. She was strong. Too strong. Buffy knew it was time to grab the monk and make a quick exit.

Before she could move, though, she heard the hum of...a motorcycle?

Sure enough, a motorcycle roared through the open entryway. Buffy frowned. How'd it get up the stairs?

Everybody's attention was diverted and the motorcycle came to a swift stop in the middle of the room. The rider smoothly dismounted, chucking a cigarette to the ground. It was a woman. Tall, with fiery red hair and gorgeous purple eyes. Okay, not normal. But they glimmered and shone like two shiny marble orbs. Buffy was transfixed.

The woman's outfit was what Buffy would call "rebel casual". A style that usually left her rolling her eyes, but on _this_ woman, it made her heart start beating faster. She just looked hot.

"Um, hello? Kinda in the middle of something!" The woman in the red dress complained.

The new arrival glanced at her, sweeping a gaze up and down. "Yeah, you were, weren't you? Too bad you won't get to finish it."

Then, with no preamble, laser beams shot out the motorcyclist's purple-hued eyes, incinerating the insane blonde woman within seconds.

Buffy stood up. "Okay...who the hell are _you_?"

Laser beams off, the new hero turned to Buffy with a grin. She started to swagger over. "Name's Shazma McAwesome. Just doing a little hellgod cleanup."

Buffy blushed as Shazma approached. She was right in front of her. And she had some sort of sexy vibe just pouring off her.

Buffy was so stunned by Shazma's Vibe of Sexy, she didn't even resist when Shazma wrapped an arm around her waist and pulled Buffy flush against her, romance novel cover style.

"Let's get this monk to a hospital, then we gotta talk about your sister."

"My...sister?" Buffy's brain was racing to form a coherent thought. This woman was soooo hot!

"Yeah. After that, you and I are going out on a date. Okay?"

Buffy nodded dumbly. She had no doubt she'd go just about anywhere with this person. But wait! What about what's-his-name? Uh...Riley? Yeah, Riley!

"Good. Maybe I'll show you my unicorn. It runs on batteries." Shazma winked.

Riley who?


End file.
